I wish I could say this blog post would contain some cool news, or a free story, or an amazing update on the agent search for Witch Lessons (actually, I did get a 50-page request last night!) but really, it is a vent post. Sigh. Double sigh.
The realization came to me just now that I have two problems (well, that I’m focusing on now)—the first is I feel weirdly antsy and static not having released any new stories or anything. I KNOW. I know. It’s only been a couple of weeks since my last one. But publishing is pretty addictive! And I’m sitting on Sonja Uncaged, just waiting on cover art. I feel like a total slacker, which I know isn’t fair to me, or that it even makes sense! I just always want to be moving forward.
The second, and biggest problem this morning, is that I am unbelievably confused and frustrated with my fairytale retelling Weightless. I’ve queried agents for it with some requests for fulls (Yippee!) but they all passed. Sad. When my editor did a manuscript analysis she remarked that she had a difficult time connecting to the story and characters—a comment more than one agent stated. I currently have the entire manuscript in third person limited point-of-view, meaning you, the reader, would know what multiple characters are thinking and feeling. Based on feedback, I thought perhaps I should use first person (where the narrator uses I, and me), but that’s getting too messy! Part of the problem is one of my main characters is just not a good narrator. She misses a good 50% of the story, if not more, and when she is there, she’s still not fully “there”. I can’t tell it only from her perspective. But there is not one single character who “sees” everything. Each characters has a truly unique perspective of the story. So…I’m stuck. How do I close the disconnect of feeling far from the characters without creating a botched-up mess of multiple points-of-view in different tenses?
Okay, that surprisingly helped a little.
I think I just need to ask myself some hard questions about whose story this is exactly, and who is best equipped to tell it. I know the story is for middle-grade (age 8-12), and I’m pretty happy with the actual plot. I just…I need to figure this part out so I can move on with a new set of queries. Please send me some good vibes, guys. I really love this story, and I want it to be right. As of now, it just is not.
Peace & Happy Holidays. I’ll check in soon.
UPDATE (A few hours later):
-Got a rejection on those first 50 pages. Oh well. You’d think that would really upset me (it did for a second, till I reminded myself that it was my FIRST agent rejection on WL, plus a quick rejection is better than a drawn-out one. And then, this second thing happened)
-I totally figured out what I want to do with the POV in this story. You know how sometimes venting or talking about something (or totally rambling/whining) can give you clarity? Well, this totally did. I know now what I want to do, and have already started changing things! Thanks for letting me vent. I feel much better now. YAY! Break-throughs are such a relief.